Friday, November 30, 2012

Cheer for old Notre Dame, the laughable Lakers and Vegas picks

Let me explain football to some of the novices out there, who just watches for an excuse to eat wings, Cheetos, drink beer and/or get away from their wives for a few hours so they can feel like a man again. "Honey, it's Saturday, you promised to go to Bed, Bath and Beyond with me today" "We are going to the Johnson's and you WILL wear that shirt I ironed for you" "Don't forget our daughters recital is at 6 pm and you WILL wear that shirt I ironed for you". Shhh, don't cry, I'm not trying to rub this in your face. I get it, you don't have time for trivial things like statistics, and the history of the game, or 5 fantasy football teams, I know boo, shhh, I know. You only get highlights and updates form your smart phone.  I on the other hand, work an hour a day, so I do have time and when I'm not working, I'm traveling; reading, absorbing, building philosophies, turning strong opinions into borderline facts. That's why I stand by my blog. Cause I drop knowledge cause I know my shit....

Wanna know what else I know, that the age old mantra, 'Defense wins championships' has never been a truer phrase ever spoken in sports. It's so easy to dismiss Notre Dame cause they win without style points, they don't have to have a dynamic offense, cause their defense is championship legit son. It's no coincidence that Notre Dame is undefeated and teams like, Oregon and Kansas State loss to inferior opponents. They loss cause they were built on offense and offenses chokes, not defense. Imagine what Alabama would have done to a team like Oregon when they would have had a month to prepare for them. Ditto for Kansas State. Notre Dame defense will keep them in every game, and if there offense doesn't make mistakes they will be in great shape, if they make plays they probably won't lose. Whoever comes out of the SEC (I call Georgia in an upset special) will have their hands full against the Fighting Irish and that's on da Fo real boo!!!

For those that keep saying that the SEC is overrated consider this; this past weekend, Florida and South Carolina, arguably the 3rd and 4th best teams in the conference, went on the road as underdogs and kicked the shit out of 2 one loss teams, in Florida State and Clemson. The SEC is far and away the best conference in football and when they do move to a 4 team playoff I have no problem with 2 of those teams being from the SEC and that's all I'm a say about it (Joe Clark)

I can't help but giggle a little bit, like a school girl discovering the joys of touching her self for the 1st time every time I see the Lakers play, they are so tragically mediocre right now. That they may actually fire 2 coaches in one season, don't be surprised, once Steve Nash comes back they will be out of excuses and no one's gonna take the blame for putting together such a flawed collection of players, an under utilized post player with great passing skills, a big man who can't hit half his free throws, a player who shoots like he's still the best player in the game, a 38 year old point guard who can't guard any guards, a bench that would have trouble making the roster of any championship quality team, all led by a coach who has an apostrophe in his name. Yep the Lakers are still fucked and I love it.

Did you know that the Denver Broncos are the odds on favorite to win the SB this year? Yep 4-1, that's better than the Patriots, Texans, Niners and Giants. I don't buy it, only because it's to good of a story. 'One of the great QB's to ever play, has his neck infused, when told to retire, he insteads leads another team all the way to the promised land'. I'm guessing if this is a dream scenario, he would kick the shit out of his old team in the Colts, beat his hated rival Tom Brady to get to the Super Bowl and then out duel his younger brother Eli to bring home the trophy... Plausible, but life doesn't work like that. On the other hand the Steelers are getting 20-1 odds, Now that's some shit I do like!!! Speaking of Vegas....

Patriots -9 over Miami
Look, let's just be honest, the Patriots are dicks, they run up the score, they try to score from the minute they take the field to the final minute of the game, 44-17?!!! ... Fuck it we're here may as well try to make it 51-17. That's just how they play. Except it, Belichek and Brady are the kind of guys that goes to the club, hits on every girl, because they believe that they should fuck them all, they are not looking for one conquest, they want them all, all the bitches and that's something we as a football society will have to deal with 
Patriots 44-Dolphins 17

Baltimore-3 over the Steelers
I mean c'mon man. I love the Steelers but without Rothlisberger and a mediocre ground attack you can't pencil them to score more than 13 points against the Ravens. Yes, I get that the Ravens themselves are offensively challenged, but they are good for at least 16 points, which means at worse case scenario it's a push. On a side note, hey Ray Rice, I drafted you with the 2nd overall pick, anytime you want to start playing like it, is A-OK with me.
Ravens 16-Steelers 10

Tampa+ 8 over the Dolphins
Look I'm tired of justifying Tampa, look at their record against the spread and leave me the fuck alone, 8 points seriously, 8 fucking points.... Nope, I'm done, nope, nope
Denver 31-Tampa 27

Tampa/Denver over 50.5
Ok maybe I have to justify this a little cause the Tampa game last week didn't go over, but that was mostly cause of missed field goals, but still I'm only softly justifying it. 31+27 =58, 58 > 50.5

Carolina -3 over Kansas City
No one is talking about Cam Newton anymore and now Cam Newton is playing reasonably well. He's the guy that plays best when he's ignored, kinda like that bad ass kid you have, you know the one that snaps at a Chuckie Cheese in the middle of the arcade, cause they think that those god damn coins grow on fucking trees, so you just leave the kid and smoke a blunt in the parking lot until they come outside with their shit together
Panthers 27-Chiefs 14

I normally keep my college games to myself but...
Nebraska-3 over Wisconsin
Has anyone see the Badgers this year, this is not the Badgers that we're used to. The QB blows, the offensive line is mediocre and they're playing in a dome which will make them seem even slower. I get that it's Nebraska and Nebraska hasn't won a meaningful game since Tom Osbourne, but still, they gotta win this, I'll even call worse case scenario, the Huskers lose the turnover battle 3-1, there you happy... Good!!!
Nebraska 24-Badgers20


Friday, November 23, 2012

Vegas picks and you read how I really feel about the Chiefs

I feel bad, to some small degree, it's like I cheated people a little bit out of life, if I DIDN'T overindulge myself on life these last 2 days, with eating and drinking myself into several comas, Wednesday and Thursday, I could have told you that the Dallas Cowboys are not more than 3 points better than anyone and don't be surprised if they lose outright because they already won 2 games in a row and they are very unlikely to win 3 in a row, because they are the model of inconsistency. I also should have shared that nothing makes New England Patriots head coach Bill Belichek, who is by most accounts a dictator, and nothing makes his dick harder than whooping the Jets in New York. 6.5 point favorite was nothing to the 'we drop 40 points on all inferior points, cause our head coach is a dick and nothing makes his dictator dick harder than rubbing his dick in his opponents dickless faces'. Whoa somebody call Dr. Suess, cause that was some Cat in the Hat shit right der' boo!!!

So in a nutshell, even though last week I was a meaningless TD throw away by Philip 'Cry me a Rivers' from a perfect 5-0. I feel like I let you down. Now for the good news, the fact that I was able to point these games out, means that I'm still in a zone and it's a Lot of football left to be played son, so lets get it on...

Bears-.5 over Minnesota
Lock this one in the books, ladies and gents. Quiet as it's kept, almost no one rallies the troops after getting there asses handed to them, quite like Lovie Smith, my gut tells me Jay Cutler will play and he has a pretty good record with the Bears. The Bears are at home and all they have to do is win. Granted Adrian Peterson is a guy who can single handedly beat you by himself, but no way the Bears let that happen, they are gonna make Christian Ponder beat them and that ain't happening in Soldier Field, it just ain't
Bears 27- Vikings 13

Tampa +1 over Atlanta
You know this routine, take Tampa Bay until further notice, they have a sick cover rate, Vegas has just noticed this, but it's too late. They are that good and the Falcons cannot be trusted in a close game with head coach Mike Smith, his play calling is as plain as his name. Tampa in some ways are a lot like Atlanta, both have a solid defense and both can score a lot of different ways, but you wanna know what they both can't do... Consistently cover the spread, Tampa sure can, that's why I take Tampa every week, cause they never let me down, I love you Tampa, I love you all season long, I promise boo
Tampa Bay 33 Falcons 30

Tampa/Falcons over 50.5
You wanna know what else Tampa does? They go over, sometimes barely and sometimes by a lot. This Sunday it will be by a lot. 33 + 30 is 63, 63 > 50.5, so 63 = Dollar, dollar, bills y'all!!!

Denver -10.5 over the Chiefs
Did you know that there is a QB controversy in Kansas City? There is, don't laugh, it's Brady Quinn... Stop laughing, versus ... Shut up, Matt Cassell... I know laugh, laugh your ass off.  This is like deciding between Pong and the Atari 2600, succotash and okra, listening to you girlfriend tell you about her day at work or listening to your girlfriend tell you why you're a fuck up, attending a work seminar or going to a klan rally, attending a kids music concert and your kid is NOT even playing or going to a Super Bowl party where no one is actually interested in watching the game, Army versus Navy, The 1st round of a tennis tournament or the 1st round of a golf tournament that doesn't have Tiger Woods. Nope, I will not stop... Having the Birds and the Bees talk with your daughter or listening to your parents bone,  going to your husbands, ex-wife's parents house for thanksgiving or getting tested for HIV. By the way the Denver Broncos have Peyton Manning, that's like having chocolate and oral sex without having to return the favor, he's awesome
Denver 34 Chiefs 10

Friday, November 16, 2012

Hooray the Lakers are gonna suck and Vegas winners make this week oh so sweet!!!

After 5 games,  Mike Brown was fired from the Lakers, your top 2 replacements were Phil Jackson who would have had to implement his triangle offense, without the benefit of a training camp and with him supposedly, requesting certain road games off. The guy you hired Mike D'Antoni is a run and shoot kinda guy, with a team that doesn't have a bunch of shooters. In other words the Lakers panicked and instead of looking in the mirror and saying we need more pieces to this puzzle. Our starting backcourt is roughly 75 years old and our bench is subpar, simply put the Lakers are fucked!!!!

Hey Lakers?!!! Why not keep Bernie Bickerstaff, an accomplished coach, who by all accounts players like playing for, and he's been there since day one, so the transition period is easy breezy. If you were going to hire outside the organization, why not Jerry Sloan?!!! Tough, defensive minded coach, who excels at coaching the pick and roll offense, which plays to the Lakers strengths and keep miles off of Kobe's and Nash legs, look how many miles he got out of Stockton and Malone. Arrrggghh, why won't anyone listen to me?!!! Anyone got 500 million dollars I can borrow, so I can buy myself into a sport franchise cause I'm a saviour son!!! (That's a lot of exclamation points)

The Clippers is the best team in the West but I still remember John Paxson almost beating the shit out of their head coach, Vinny Del Negro, when he coached the Chicago Bulls and for that reason I'm not hopping on that Clipper train. The New York Knicks are the best team in the East, but at some point highly paid Amare Stoudamire is coming back and he will best serve the team as their 6th man, I don't think that will happen, and for that reason I'm not hopping on that Knick bandwagon

Miguel Cabrera won the MVP, with the 1st triple crown won in almost 40 years, how could he not? However Mike Trout, who played in a way tougher division, was a much better defender and his offense across the board matched up very well with Cabrera, was my choice, yes Cabrera's team made the playoffs and Trout's didn't, but the Angels had a better record. I'm just saying boo, congrats on a monster year Cabrera but Trout is the better player. (22 1st place votes to 6 is a minor travesty)

The Florida Marlins made some deft deals to get some quality young talent while shaving their payroll down by more than half. They may very well turnout to be the Tampa Bay Rays of the National League.  That being said, they are the Amway of baseball, a scam, lure the city into paying for a new stadium and then trade off half their assets during the 1st half of the season and get rid of the other half at the end of the season. I said years ago that the Marlins should be retracted. They are all about dollars not winning. I hope no one goes to another Florida Marlin game again, there I said it and I feel good

Vegas Picks
I went 1-2 last week, but that Bears game should be incomplete, cause Jay Cutler got hurt and didn't play in the 2nd half , where he plays his best. Speaking of Cutler, when players intentionally lay somebody out like they did with Cutler, they should be automatically kicked out of that game and suspended for the following week. (Scott Fossum) Missing 1/17th of your paychecks will put a stop to headhunting and protect the league's greatest asset, the QB!!!

Packers-3 over Detroit
Ok the Packers are really good, it pains me to say it, but they are. So whenever they get a 3 point spread, I take them either way, Aaron Rodgers alone, is a TD better than any QB in the league except Manning(s), Brady, Brees.  Last I looked Stafford is the QB of the Lions, I can't get on board with a sub-500 team against the Pack who is still in must win mode.
Packers 30 Lions 24

Jets + 3.5 over Rams
Hey, Tim Tebow is terrible, kudos to that anonymous Jet player for stating that in such a cowardice manner. It appears that Tebow is such an awful practice player that they can justify, not only starting Tebow, but changing there whole offensive game plan around someone who can't throw?!!! Starting Tebow is like handing a steering wheel to a blind person and believing you're gonna get home safely ... blind faith. I think this is gonna rally the Jets and make them lose by just a fg instead of 7 points
Rams 20 Jets 17

Tampa -1.5 over Carolina
Look take Tampa Bay until further notice, they are one of the 10 best teams in the NFL right now, trust me boo
Tampa 34 Panthers 24

Tampa/Carolina over 48
34 + 24 is 58! 58 is > than 48. > this means greater than!!!

Denver - 7.5 over San Diego
Ummm, the Chargers were at home and were spotted a 24-0 lead against the Broncos, they lost by more than 7. The Broncos are on full throttle as Peyton has something to prove. A Peyton Manning with something to prove should always be factored in when picking spreads. BTW the Norv Turner/ Philip Rivers combo is the worse team-up since Kim Kardashian/Kris humphries, does that drive home my point Denver 37 San Diego 14 Denver's Defense turning Rivers miscues into points 17. Yep Philip Rivers loses to himself by 3 points!!!

Monday, November 12, 2012

Why I cared about this election

Well the election has been over for a week now and I have had time to reflect. Reflect mostly on the fact of why I cared so much about this election, even more so than 2008. It is really simple for me, it's cause Barack Obama is black, very little to do with his policies or Romney policies. That maybe hard for people to hear but it's true. If Hillary Clinton was president it wouldn't mean much to me. I'm not a political guy, I believe both parties are flawed, as I listened to the second debate and each candidate gave their logic on balancing the budget. I knew that each of those strategies would not work as they were related to the American people. Romney's math didn't add up and Obama can't use BORROWED money from the wars to pay off our debt. Blah, blah I kid that I am a libertarian trapped in a democrats body. But still...

For A LOT of black people, the only black president we thought we would ever have, is the one from the movie Deep Impact and the brother from the TV show 24, but then Barack Obama came along. Now this may not has been as prideful as the birth of our children or even as prideful as my favorite team (Da Bears) winning the super bowl, but it's up there, waaayyyy up there. There in lies the problem, we as a black community had. Not enough and definitely not enough of people with influence from the right side said the right things.

If more of the right people would have said (this is a generalization speech) ' Look we think it's great that we finally got an African American as president, it shows the diversity and the changing times of America and we disagree and nor will we seek out the vote that has any racial undertones toward him, President Obama has worked hard to get this country right, we are just strongly against his view on how this country should be recovered, [case in point, case in point, etc...]' Instead the 1st 2 years were spent with asking for his birth certificate and this was followed up with racially insensitive slogans of "take back our country".  When you have the nations 1st black president and a overwhelming white majority of a group of people say we need to take back our country, it can't nor it SHOULDN'T be viewed as anything but racially insensitive. If you want to lead this country you need to be respectful to all including the other 47%

I never cared about Romney's 47% comment, I thought it would hurt him but I wasn't offended. However, Donald Trump has led the charge with the birth certificate movement, he also was a supporter of the Take Back our Country motto. Mitt Romney flew in personally to receive Donald Trump's endorsement. I have a problem with that!!! A lot of republicans who are not racist at all, hate Barack and I don't have a problem with it, but if you are also going to ignore clear racially insensitive things being said and done just to secure right wing support, then you may not be part of the problem, but you are definitely not the solution. A lot of people that has never been judged by the color of their skin, nor has judged people by the color of their skin can relate to this blog. I don't get upset when people don't support our President, I get bothered when they don't understand why I support him

Even if I believed that Barack had the worse policies ever, but then I saw a picture of him being hung in effigy, or people calling him ignorant or dumb or unqualified. That will take precedent over any of his politics. If you have a kid and he/she played sports and someone came up to you and said that your kid is a piece of shit, even if you thought your kid was bad at sports, you would be pissed to hear something like that said, and naturally you would defend them. That's how a lot of the black community sees it, all we're doing is protecting our own. By protecting, I mean we are demanding that he gets shown the same respect you showed for George Bush Jr., who left this country in a bad way.

People will say whatever it is they want to say, especially on sites like FaceBook, when my college buddies post how dumb people are for supporting Barack, or others post like "Time to take out the trash"on election day, it resonates with people who have much more at stake in this than just politics.
When Barack won this last tuesday, I was excited but I never thought to post anything on FB or any other social media about it. It's not sports, I'm not trying to rub this in anyone's face. The course our country is taking is very serious business to a lot of people, so I'm not gonna be insensitive to how other people feel. I have a lot of republican friends and a ton more democratic friends on fb because comics are GENERALLY more liberal and minorities are as well. That being said there was venom being spewed on FB ON BOTHSIDES. It's so easy for people to say what ever it is they want to say and not be held accountable for it. Such is life I guess

Not once in this blog have I openly endorsed any of our president's policies. It's not about that, this was written for the general lack of respect we have shown each other over these last 4 years. Points don't have to be driven home with such derogatory language, take the high road, it's not sports. And speaking of sports, the packers can go fuck themselves... Go Bears!!! :)

Heat -5
Denver o 201.5
Portland -2.5

Now I feel better!!!

Friday, November 9, 2012

Bullet point blog and riding my Vegas momentum

With an ailing over the hill Steve Nash, a very mediocre bench and an overall poorly constructed Los Angeles Laker team, yes Mike Brown you are the fall guy

Crash landing, James Harden is coming back down to earth... Hard!!! Look Harden is tough and he can score points, lots of 'em, but I don't get that feeling he's a number 1 guy and with Jeremy Lin as the point guard, the Houston Rockets have the most overrated backcourt in basketball.

The baseball season has been over for nearly 2 weeks and they are just starting to hand out the post season awards, look boo, we're in mid football season, the NBA is crackalackin and the college football season is getting really good...I'm not saying that I don't care, just not as much. Announce them awards as soon as the World Series is over boo

Move over RGIII and Andrew Luck, Doug Martin is trying to steamroll his way to the rookie of the year and yes, Tampa Bay is the better of the three respective teams and that should help

Yeah, yeah Peyton Manning looks great, but no way is he the mid season MVP over Matt Ryan and the 8-0 Falcons, and yes the Falcons beat the Broncos, mostly due to Peyton's 4 1st half interceptions

Alabama reminds me an awful lot of that 2002 Miami Hurricane team, that tried to repeat as National Champions, but came up short against the Ohio State Buckeyes. I think someone will beat them in the title game, it's just too easy for it to play out with them winning it all. That's a double dog dare Vegas, make them a double digit favorite over Oregon, Kansas State or Notre Dame and see what I do, what, what!!!

Vegas Picks
So I bounced back in a nice way last week going a perfect 3-O with my Vegas picks. Sure I may have just went 7-6 overall, but if you bet on every game last week i'm also willing to wager that your life is falling apart (I'll take the under 120 days for a meltdown, or you stealing your mom's jewelry to pay your bookie) Anyway the key to staying hot is to go with teams that you have a good feel for so here we go:
Tampa Bay -3 over San Diego
Look people Tampa is a quality football team, they were 10-6 just 2seasons ago before injuries and a Radio Raheem, 'Fight the Power' coaching meltdown killed them last year, they since have drafted a stud running back (Doug Martin) got a number 1 receiver in Vincent Jackson and lost early games to quality football teams. If that's not a good enough reason then consider their opponent. There is not a worse historically Head football coach than Norv Turner, what I mean is. sure there were worse coaches, but they were generally removed within a year or 2, not fucking Norv, he just keeps hanging around, cranking out mediocre season after mediocre season. You also have to consider the regression of Philip Rivers, he was once considered a top 5 QB in this league, holy shit, right?!!! He and Norv Turner are probably on the sideline wagering, "I bet you can't make that throw" 'I bet I can' then after the play 'god dammit!!! Double or nothing'?!!!
Tampa 31 Chargers 20
Giants-3.5 over the Bengals
The Giants on the road is always a solid play. They play better on the road than when they're at home. I think it may have something to do with the fact their home games aren't actually in NY but New Jersey, when Eli wakes up in his nice plush ass pad in downtown Manhattan, and he's gotta drive to work too .... New Jersey, it just takes a little sumptin, sumptin away. That and the Bengals are spiraling downward or they are just being the Bengals, however you want to call it
Giants 24 Bengals 17
Bears-1.5 over Houston
When it comes to having a feel for a team, I know my Bears. They are poised to cover this game, consider this, last week I took the Bears at -3.5 against the Titans,as I pointed out the Bears had scored 41 points against the 2 previous AFC opponents and they will again score 41 against the week Titans, I was wrong, they dropped 51. Now I know that Houston is tough but they are still an AFC team and the Bears rules the AFC south this year, the game is at home and its nationally televised, which means you won't see the Bears Defense/special teams score a TD because the cameras will be too busy staring at Jay Cutler posture on the sideline
Bears 31 Texans 20 with a bad weather adjusted score of Bears 23 Titans 16

Sunday, November 4, 2012

I'm applying for a job with Vegas Bookers this week

The Big 3
Tampa Bay +1 over the Raiders
Listen to me folks the Raiders are not a good team, as a matter of fact they are so not good, that they are rumored to be interested in Tim Tebow. No one in the NFL who believes in there team is interested in Tim Tebow. You think the Pittsburgh Steelers are thinking "we're a Tebow away from being an elite team" When you think Tebow you're thinking miracle ... Tampa Bay 27 Raiders 23 

Bears-3.5 over Titans 
The Bears have dropped over 40 points against 2 teams this year and they both play in the AFC, now they got the Titans who lost to the Colts last week and the Colts are one of the 2 teams the Bears dropped 40 + on and the Titans aren't about to score 38 points Bears 41 Titans 10 

Seattle-4 over Minnesota 
If you haven't been able to pick up a chick in the bar for a while, you don't go to the hardest place in the city to pick up a chick, you go to a trashy bar, befriend a girl you would never bring home to your parents, fill her up with some well tequila, go back to her place and hump her til you get your confidence back. Guess what, the Vikings are reeling and Going to Seattle is not a slump buster Seahawks 27 Vikings 17 

Other Picks
Dolphins-2.5 over Indy Ok Miami I believe in you 19-16
Lions -5 over Jacksonville The Lions are good and desperate and Jacksonville blows Lions 27 Jags 20

Dallas + 4 over Atlanta Vegas is daring you to go against the Cowboys ...daring you... How dare you? Cowboys 31 Falcons 30

Pittsburgh +3.5 over N.Y. Giants Whenever Ben Rothlisberger get points I take Pittsburgh and so should you Steelers 27 Giants 24

Cleveland +4 over Baltimore The browns will run all over the Ravens you hear that Fantasy owners who has Trent Richardson, they'll still lose but it's gonna be close Ravens 20 Browns 17

Green Bay -9.5 over Arizona I don't like double digit spreads and this one dropped to 9.5 Packers 26.9 Arizona 17

Bengals +4 over the Broncos does anyone know how to spell Cincy if they never lived there? How many N's are there, where to I place the C's? Anyways the Broncos are coming off a monday night game the Bengals off a bye week it'll be close Denver 24 Cincy 23

Houston -10.5 over Buffalo I know, I know, I said I hate double digit spreads, but good lord the Bills defense is awful and J.J. Watts is gonna destroy Fitzpatrick, the only way the Bills cover this spread is if the Bills win the turnover battle 3-1 and score a special teams TD, thats a lot to ask for Houston 37 Bills 17
Skins -3 over Carolina I suspect that cam newton will be fired up for this game, so lots of points will be scored, but in the end Cam doesn't win the close ones and the rook aka RGIII does (and not once did I mention the color of their skin, you're welcome Warren Moon) Skins 31 Panthers 27

Eagles +3 over Saints Listen the Eagles are reeling, I was pro Andy Reid and now I'm no. When Vick turned the ball over they still won and now Vick doesn't turn it over and they lose, and that's on Reid. His team does not play hard for him and his once offensive brilliant mind is predictable but I'm gonna stay with them one more week because the saints are not the same team this year and Vick has a dog that's gotta mean something Eagles 28 Saints 24